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Just one? All salad forks are fake forks.

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Just one? All salad forks are fake forks.

1 week ago 1 week ago

Just one? All salad forks are fake forks.

by Shivvy bot 1 week ago1 week ago

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🙂
A perfect weekend
What kind of archeologist carries a weapon?
Creature Comfort
Yes, $30 an hour
A pet peeve of mine
Looked in the mirror this morning. Damn, I really need a shave and haircut
HEAR ALL ABOUT IT
You’d think I’d have gotten it right by now.
Very good, Steve
But are they any good?
Or snacks
No, this is worse. It was done on purpose…..
As fortold!
People these days…
Jeez
I’m happy I work on my own now.
NSFW – Australian Minions
Or best if yours is about to overflow
👍
A joke for the Austrians
He’s doing it right
Might have to wait a long time
OMG
You know the movie.

🙂

🙂
A perfect weekend

A perfect weekend
What kind of archeologist carries a weapon?

What kind of archeologist carries a weapon?
Creature Comfort

Creature Comfort
Yes, $30 an hour

Yes, $30 an hour
A pet peeve of mine

A pet peeve of mine
Looked in the mirror this morning. Damn, I...

Looked in the mirror this morning. Damn, I...
HEAR ALL ABOUT IT

HEAR ALL ABOUT IT
You’d think I’d have gotten it right by...

You’d think I’d have gotten it right by...
Very good, Steve

Very good, Steve
But are they any good?

But are they any good?
Or snacks

Or snacks
No, this is worse. It was done on...

No, this is worse. It was done on...
As fortold!

As fortold!
People these days…

People these days…
Jeez

Jeez
I’m happy I work on my own now.

I’m happy I work on my own now.
NSFW – Australian Minions

NSFW – Australian Minions
Or best if yours is about to overflow

Or best if yours is about to overflow
👍

👍
A joke for the Austrians

A joke for the Austrians
He’s doing it right

He’s doing it right
Might have to wait a long time

Might have to wait a long time
OMG

OMG
You know the movie.

You know the movie.
For us night owls

For us night owls
Ooooopsies

Ooooopsies
“And stop repeating everything I say.”

“And stop repeating everything I say.”
Well, it is motivational … sort of

Well, it is motivational … sort of
I’ll bring the fireball!

I’ll bring the fireball!
No, I am NOT the janitor. Racist. I’m...

No, I am NOT the janitor. Racist. I’m...
He’s wheelie wheelie bothersome

He’s wheelie wheelie bothersome
UK going through a heatwave right now

UK going through a heatwave right now
I could get behind adopting a few wild...

I could get behind adopting a few wild...
IQ: Negative

IQ: Negative
Yup, I had one early-mid ’60s

Yup, I had one early-mid ’60s
You may argue that it’s a shorter amount...

You may argue that it’s a shorter amount...
I, too, feel magical after a bit of...

I, too, feel magical after a bit of...
Yeah, screw that I’m out

Yeah, screw that I’m out
Also applies to humans

Also applies to humans
Leaf blowers are a pet peeve of mine.

Leaf blowers are a pet peeve of mine.
These aren’t the oils you’re looking for. Move...

These aren’t the oils you’re looking for. Move...
Just gonna take this for a spin

Just gonna take this for a spin
And they told me to wok this way

And they told me to wok this way
Boyardee is clearly to be used for tarot,...

Boyardee is clearly to be used for tarot,...
Yeah, you know what it is

Yeah, you know what it is
Me

Me
I think I’m coming down with something myself....

I think I’m coming down with something myself....
Now play “smelly cat, smelly cat, what are...

Now play “smelly cat, smelly cat, what are...
How much cheaper can it get??

How much cheaper can it get??
Quick! Call a toe truck!

Quick! Call a toe truck!
Ok, I will make an exception because he...

Ok, I will make an exception because he...
Oh, it’s me. I am that friend.

Oh, it’s me. I am that friend.
Thunderstruck

Thunderstruck
Same

Same
Thinking of eggs for some reason

Thinking of eggs for some reason
Don’t tell me what to do, Mat

Don’t tell me what to do, Mat
What, you don’t like cake?

What, you don’t like cake?
Taking that shit to a whole ‘nother level

Taking that shit to a whole ‘nother level
You gave me the name. I am going...

You gave me the name. I am going...
Oh it’s back again. I think we’ve been...

Oh it’s back again. I think we’ve been...
Socket 2 m!

Socket 2 m!
Just one? All salad forks are fake forks.

Just one? All salad forks are fake forks.
“I accept your praise but am concerned you...

“I accept your praise but am concerned you...
Just strutting down the street

Just strutting down the street
Science fact: Uranus frequently emits bursts of methane...

Science fact: Uranus frequently emits bursts of methane...
This also explains the foreboding feelings of alleyways...

This also explains the foreboding feelings of alleyways...
If you like it then you shoulda put...

If you like it then you shoulda put...
Now, I’m not one to kinkshame, BUT…

Now, I’m not one to kinkshame, BUT…
Sometimes the internet delivers top content

Sometimes the internet delivers top content
“No, I said I’m doing nothing tonight. Specifically....

“No, I said I’m doing nothing tonight. Specifically....
Oh, I’ve been an NPC for years. It’s...

Oh, I’ve been an NPC for years. It’s...
No, Kyian!

No, Kyian!
But I use “no more tears” shampoo

But I use “no more tears” shampoo
The root of all evil

The root of all evil
Silly cone implants

Silly cone implants
…Gotta try that

…Gotta try that
He needs a chiropractor and neurologist after bashing...

He needs a chiropractor and neurologist after bashing...
I have these all the time

I have these all the time
Till we never meet again!

Till we never meet again!
roar

roar
This was NOT the victory I thought it...

This was NOT the victory I thought it...
Your guess is as good as mine

Your guess is as good as mine
Not the master of disguise…

Not the master of disguise…
Don’t try Betty

Don’t try Betty
So dangerous

So dangerous
This is supposed to be turn-based combat. When...

This is supposed to be turn-based combat. When...
Don’t throw off his groove!

Don’t throw off his groove!
Bear with me here

Bear with me here
Even worse is when you don’t buy the...

Even worse is when you don’t buy the...
Oui that hurts

Oui that hurts
Hey, me too!

Hey, me too!
We does

We does
Naw, it just becomes a piece for me

Naw, it just becomes a piece for me
Do any of them have to be affectionately?

Do any of them have to be affectionately?
What a silly hypothetical question

What a silly hypothetical question
Must not be important then

Must not be important then
Sounds like too much work

Sounds like too much work
Awkward

Awkward
They were talking about me again

They were talking about me again

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